A month ago, around February 13, SW Virginia sagged under an ice blanket, everything coniferous leaning or buckling or some combination thereof. Roads blocked, downed lines, a pop rocks concert throughout the long dark of night. We lost power for 48 hours, only to have it restored just as steady rains rinsed through the region dumping more water than we’d gauged in one day in these three plus years. The holler washed, toggling from soil course to water course, to what I would guess was a depth of at least 10 inches. And the creek spilled over the driveway, another first, though the washout was minor in the end. Not that there is any such thing as an end. A weather event lashes down. We clean up. And so that’s pretty much what I’ve been up to for the past several weeks, aside from joining Is. and her roommate E. on short trip to San Diego, and then being sick for a solid week at the end of that trip. Friday I was back in the yard again for some tree cleanup.

A mature stand of white pines towers weak and leanerly over the north side of the holler. It has ‘we are soon about to fall down’ energy. Are they thirty or forty years old? I’d guess so. Fifty or 100 trees dropped in the ground in, say, 1985. They are bedraggled, showing lots of signs of shedding whole trees or major parts of trees in recent years. I am older than them; I get it. February’s conditions brought down four or five of them, and elsewhere throughout the holler as many as ten more trees snapped off their tops or leaned over kaput. I have a decent Echo chainsaw. It’s plastic, nothing to brag about it’s bar length, so just one notch up the model numbers from a child’s chainsaw. But just this once, I decided I could use an extra hand. I texted a landscaping crew we’d used a couple of times to weed eat the creak bed last summer, and they were interested, said they would stop by, then didn’t. No show. No message. Just blew it off. So I crawled back to the drawing board, a new query posted to Everything Christiansburg, and found a generalist willing to cut the trunks into 15-inch pieces, wood burner sized.

I have brushed a few of the trunks so as to introduce a gradual, incremental method to the cleanup. I’d told myself this week, spring break week for VT, would be good for two hours a day in springlike weather, late afternoon breaks from the computer to chip away, saw away, branch dragging into piles, the slow clearings not long behind. Two hours on the Echo chainsaw is about two refuels, allowing for interruptions to clear branches and make space. But then I got drawn waders deep into detailing the pond, and that cascaded into bigger pond retaining wall problems than I was bargaining for, so there went a day, and I still don’t know enough about hydraulic cements but the pond wall still stands. And it will be repaired, eventually, or even likelier, it will crumble. Masonry not being high on my short list of competencies.

When I look at the trees in various states of brokenness and leaning along the banks, I size up their cleanup and think it will quick, manageable, even basic. They look small, no more heavy or complex than a nub of steamed broccoli. I’m really ready. Gloves on. Water bottle. Appropriate footwear. I let the chickens out and get to it, sawing then hauling, bigger branches then smaller ones. I am not getting better at guessing correctly the work involved. I always underestimate. The cleanup is slower; the work is more; the wood is heavier. The chickens, if they notice at all, quietly celebrate that there will be more snail’s-paced afternoons free-ranging as I trundle along, small branches in this pile, medium limbs still needing chainsaw work here, the rest stacked in the woodshed.

Tree cleanup notwithstanding, dubious labor estimates favor me now and then, meaning that sometimes I imagine something will be arduous and it turns out to be a cinch. This happened to be the case when, after weeks of overthinking the tools I would need to cut sheet metal, I got started on the chicken coop roof. I’d read around about needing right and left curving sheers, about grinder blades, about using a circular saw with a cheap wood blade on backwards, about nibblers, and so on. Phone calls to my dad and to my brother. How would you cut it? And then I ordered the metal, picked it up, and got started, figuring it would be the hardest part of the job. I was convinced I was going to screw up a few cuts. But then I tried it, and it was nothing, a breeze. Measure twice, Sharpie line, and tin snips eased through it swiftly, straight lines, not much hazardous waste (I was worried about curls of sharp metal too small to clean up effectively and right-sized for harming the chickens). This kind of being wrong about labor feels light and the holler saturates again with hues of hope and possibility.

Such is wayfinding in projects. Venture in and rarely is it as I imagined it would be. I’m routinely off at guessing how many hours it will take to clear a tree. Yet, in another project, like the coop roof, a task I imagine to be immensely complicated turns out to be as easy as cutting a sheet of construction paper. As grand inconclusion goes, these puzzles are a lot like scholarship, grounded formations beholden to the unpredictability of labor and materials and time.